Frank Bruno: “How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They’re just as good as dead.”
Tyrell Biggs: “I could have knocked him out in the third round but I wanted to do it slowly, so he would remember this night for a long time.”
Lennox Lewis: “I’m coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I’m just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!”
“It’s ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm.”
Your name is Cody, and you have no past, only a backstory. Some street gang kidnapped your girlfriend Jessica, you are told, and you need to punch them all out in order to rescue her. The details are not important–just start punching!
The clock is ticking, literally. You have to reach the end of each gang-infested street before the timer reaches zero, or Jessica is finished. Unfortunately you never learned to run, much less drive a car, or ride a bicycle, or even take the bus. No, Cody, you never learned much of anything in your life: all you can do now is walk around, jump, kick, punch, and “special attack.”
Lucky for you, most of the Mad Gear gang attended the same inner-city schools. [Read more →]
“Diamond Dave, The Kung Fu Hillbilly”
At Diamond Dave’s Ninja School, you’ll learn the difference between a Ninja chop, a Judo chop, and a Karate chop.
This video clip has been chosen, as I have chosen others before it.
Each of them shall display the ancient art of the ninja warrior.
So you want to be a teenage ninja
Let me begin to show you what ya gotta do
Ya gotta know the rules and pay your dues
If you wanna graduate from this ninja school [Read more →]
Alluda Majaka was the first Indian film in history to earn more than 2 million rupees. Starring Chiranjeevi–the Desi Chuck Norris–Alluda Majaka thrilled audiences with its gritty, no-nonsense action sequences.
In 1982, Chuck Norris was choked out by the famous Gracie Jujitsu family. A decade later, everybody started copying him. We now know this phenomenon as the UFC. (pg. 57)
On the set of “Walker, Texas Ranger,” Chuck Norris once took a live rattlesnake by surprise. Then he set it down on the ground, and grabbed it again. The director fleed the scene in terror. (pg. 2)
Chuck Norris is half Irish, and half leg. (pg. 20)
In the interest of full disclosure: I owe Chuck Norris a favor. It was by introducing his “facts” to the mainstream audience back in 2006, that I first established this blog as a premier source for martial arts humor, news, fact and opinion. As payback, he has kindly allowed me to review his latest book, [Read more →]
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