Miracle Yogi Prahlad Jani Gives Up Facebook, Food

From the UK Telegraph, April 2010

Prahlad Jani

Prahlad Jani is being held in isolation in a hospital in Ahmedabad, Gurjarat, where he is being closely monitored by leading Indian scientists, who believe he may have a genuine quality which could help save lives.

It is alleged that Prahlad Jani does not use, and has never used Facebook or Twitter. Also, that he has eaten nothing over the past sixty years.

Prahlad has now spent six days without status updates, food or water under strict observation, and doctors say his body has not yet shown any adverse effects from this electronic quarantine. He also does not appear to suffer from hunger or dehydration.

Mr. Jani, who claims to have left home aged seven and lived as a wandering sadhu or holy man, is regarded as a “breatharian” who can live on a “spiritual life-force” alone. He believes he is sustained by a goddess who pours an “elixir” through a hole in his palate, and who keeps him informed on all the latest news and entertainment trends.

Jack Johnson: Boxer, Bullfighter, Badass

John Arthur “Jack” Johnson was the first black heavyweight champion, but also paved the road for future athletes in the ways of trash talking, flashy bling and openly banging white women in an era when that could get you lynched. The man was everything Muhammad Ali would be…except he was doing it at the turn of the century.

Mike Tyson: Quotes of Wisdom And Wonderment

On his opponents…

Mike Tyson

Frank Bruno: “How dare these boxers challenge me with their primitive skills? It makes me angry. They’re just as good as dead.”

Tyrell Biggs: “I could have knocked him out in the third round but I wanted to do it slowly, so he would remember this night for a long time.”

Lennox Lewis: “I’m coming for you man. My style is impetuous. My defense is impregnable, and I’m just ferocious. I want your heart. I want to eat his children. Praise be to Allah!”

“It’s ludicrous these mortals even attempt to enter my realm.”

Karate Dance War Explosion!

Sensei Pacer is not only a former member of The Power Team, a crew of Christian Evangelist strongmen. He is also a personal trainer, and the founder of Hip Hop Martial Arts.

Master Sensei Pacer likes to say that “nobody in the world moves like Sensei Pacer.”

Suzi Wong, Fytedancer
Suzi Wong, Fytedancer

Sorry, Sensei Pacer, but I know someone who moves like Sensei Pacer!

If Street Fights Were More Like Final Fight…

Final Fight
Final Fight, a classic arcade game
[Play Flash version online for free]

Your name is Cody, and you have no past, only a backstory. Some street gang kidnapped your girlfriend Jessica, you are told, and you need to punch them all out in order to rescue her. Details are not important–just start punching!

The clock is ticking, literally. You have to reach the end of each gang-infested street before the timer reaches zero, or Jessica is finished. Unfortunately you never learned to run, much less drive a car, or ride a bicycle, or even take the bus. No, Cody, you never learned much of anything in your life: all you can do now is walk around, jump, kick, punch, and “special attack.”

Lucky for you, most of the Mad Gear gang attended the same inner-city schools.

Penn and Teller: Two Morons Learn Martial Arts

Penn & Teller: Bullshit

In a recent episode of their hit Showtime series, stage magicians Penn Jilette and Raymond Teller warn viewers away from the universally fraudulent field of martial arts. Now a real expert martial artist rescues us from their half-baked debunkings.

For their own convenience, Penn and Teller divide the world of martial arts into three categories: traditional, mystical, and murderous.